20 replies to this topic

[khh]

[link to KS update]
 
Tome of the Balance
 
The digital preview of the Tome of the Balance is ready for download for eligible backers
($50 tier and up). You can find the PDF in your Humble Bundle account, under purchases.
 
If you've never claimed your digital rewards, please read this forum post for instructions.
 
As announced back in September, we decided to merge the printed materials into a single
volume. The Tome is combined art and lore book, short story collection and graphic novel —
and, like the game itself, much bigger than originally anticipated.
 
Note that this is a first look at what the Tome will look like in print. There will be changes and
addendums, including additional artwork. We’re releasing the digital preview today for two
reasons:
 
One, we wanted to send it out before the holidays, because this is the perfect time of the
year to curl up in a comfy chair with a good (digital) book.
 
Two, once we start printing, there’s no way back, and errors can’t be easily fixed.
 
The Tome is a Big Boy and there’s a ton of text. We’ve done several editing passes but there
will be grammatical and formatting errors. If you come across any, we’d appreciate hearing
about it: we plan to fix them all before sending the book off to the printers.
 
Please send your feedback to backers@redthreadgames.com using the subject line ‘Tome
of the Balance’, or post to the appropriate thread on our official forum.
 
Do keep in mind, as stated in the book itself, that the Tome includes lore and designs written
before production began on Chapters. There were many changes during production, and if
something in the Tome doesn’t factually match the end result, it’s probably not an error.
 
The current PDF will be replaced with an updated version as soon as it’s ready for printing,
after the holidays. You’ll be able to re-download it at that point.
 
One final thing: this is a standard PDF. It contains no protections against ‘redistribution’.
Given that the Tome is supposed to be a Kickstarter exclusive, we’d greatly appreciate your
support in keeping it exclusive.
 
One more final thing: if you’re a lower-tier backer (or a non-backer) who's interested in
purchasing the digital edition of the Tome, we’re looking for input and ideas. We could make
it available for sale via our website (or Steam) but we don’t know if that’s entirely fair to
higher-tier backers — at least not yet. We’ll be listening to your thoughts on this matter and
make a decision in January.
 
Oh, and one last thing: if you stuck around long enough to read this, you deserve a post-
credits stinger. Here is what the Dreamer Edition will look like when it ships next year, with
the printed Tome (and other goodies) inside.
 


Still here? We’d like to remind you that our upcoming game Draugen is available for wish-
listing on both Steam and GOG.com. If you enjoy our work, please consider adding the game
to your list(s). As always, we appreciate your support — we wouldn't be here if it wasn't for
you.
 
Thank you, and happy holidays from everyone at Red Thread Games!
 

[wandrew]

Hmm, not in my Humble Bundle account yet.
 
EDIT: Thanks to Babel-17, I discovered that the platform drop-down menu has the option 'E-Book' (as well as the default Linus or Windows). It shows up then.

[Ringtail]

Let's get that grammar/formatting errata list started!

 

I'm about 90 pages in, and here's what I have so far:

 

***

Page 6: 

Content => Contents

Vener => Venar ; I know this may have been the original name, but it’s very weird to see it “misspelled” here, especially since it shows up “correctly” later in the Tome.

 

Page 7:

Buisnesses => Businesses

 

Page 8:

Wits => Wit’s

 

Page 13:

The Azadi was => The Azadi were

 

Page 15:

sexual transmitted => sexually transmitted

 

Page 18:

Nigali => Nirgali ; although this may be the planning doc vs. the final game...come on.  Gotta be "Nirgali steel."

fajitas => tortillas

 

Page 23:

Mole-People ; like the Venar, it’s weird to not see “Banda” in this entry, and likewise, the “correct” version shows up later in the Tome.  It’s also odd to not see any reference to them singing to the soil.

 

Page 29, 30:

Vener => Venar

 

Page 59:

Azadis => Azadi’s

 

Page 87:

it looks like the paragraph on Bip’s real name is duplicated from page 84.

 

Page 89:

Vamon’ds => Vamon’s

 

Page 111:

gety => get

Na’ane and her family was => Na'ane and her family were

 

Page 115:

peoples => people

Changagriel => Ch’angagriel

 

Page 120:

Dreamstone => soul-stone (?)

 

Page 123:

incombat => in combat

free reign => free rein

weed out => weeding out

 

Page 125:

headquarter => headquarters

near destroyed => nearly destroyed

Sister Adeleh’s => Sister Adeleh

free reigns => free rein

 

Page 127:

free reigns => free rein

 

Page 170:

all-power => all-powerful

 

Page 171:

preciously few => precious few

 

Page 172:

watered out => watered down

 

Page 176:

well…, nerves, face :  these are all italicized, and shouldn’t be

 

Page 177:

Browar: beer : it looks like the italicization on these words was reversed

Geizhals : this should be italicized

 

Page 181:

Mumbasa => Mombasa

 

Page 183:

headquarter => headquarters

 

Page 188:

poor soul have => poor soul has

 

Page 190:

Mira and Wits => Mira and Wit’s

 

Page 193:

the warm and dry => warm and dry

 

Page 197:

help with their campaign : is there missing text here?

Political => political

has made him => have made him

 

Page 203:

under her wings => under her wing

Hannah is seen by some : this paragraph duplicates a paragraph on page 202.  

Also the paragraph starting “She’s a runaway”  seems to both duplicate and contradict the paragraph on 202 that says she doesn’t know much about her parents.

 

Page 204:

cabinet => cupboard

Page 211:

fond- : delete the hyphen

 

Page 213:

social debate and -  :  is there missing text here?

 

Page 214:

went into reclusion: either “went into seclusion” or “became a recluse”

 

Page 216:

for years she — :  this should probably be “for years —“, and “she” should come after the end of the parenthetical statement

a Wati => WATI

 

Page 217:

Wati => WATI (several instances)

dance after Wati’s pipe => dance to WATI’s tune

 

Page 220:

hobbled together => cobbled together

 

Page 250:

to find back => either “to come back” or “to find their way back”

 

Page 299:

branding => brandishing

[Carla]

Only one I found so far that you haven't is:

 

Page 30: 

Soutlands => Southlands

[Mime Paradox]

Some of these may be beyond the scope of the requested feedback, since they call for actual rewriting, but still:

 

Page 84 - 86: Data redundancy in the first few and last few paragraphs. 

Page 89, column 2: "Vamon'ds gang" should be "Vamon's gang"

Page 90, Crow's entry: The first few paragraphs are redundant, regarding Crow's ability to speak. Also, his species and name origin are better placed before the paragraph about his parents. Suggestion:

 

Crow is a brash, wisecraking bird whose only gift appears to be that of the gab. However, he's not the most politically correct of talking birds...

 

Crow's heritage and species are unknown. Not actually a crow, his name was given to him by young April Ryan, who named him after her favorite cartoon character, Crowboy. He never knew his parents...  

 

Page 98 - 99: Paragraph break needed between "that, so far, remains almost entirely unrequited." and "In almost every way, a nondescript twen-". The sentence could also be merged into the following paragraph, so it's "In almost every way, a nondescript twenty-five-year-old human, Jakai's function in the story

 

Page 113: Once-Blind Bob's profile, paragraph one: Remove an errant  "wot".

 

Page 115, column 1, paragraph 3: "con man" is two separate words. 

 

Page 125, Sister Adeleh, paragraph 1: "free reins," not "free reigns."

 

Page 127, column 1, paragraph 4: ditto. 

 

Page 127, column 1, paragraph 5: and again. I suggest replacing it with "freedom," to avoid repetition. 

 

Page 128, final paragraph: "exposed" seems like the wrong word, given that the rest of the profile suggests the opposite.

 

Page 167, Column 1: New and port look weirdly separate. 

 

Page 179, Column 1, paragraph 3: "instead" should be one word.

 

Page 197, Column 2: The person Baruti was engaged to is his fiancée, not fiancé, which indicates a man.  Very confusing, given that the profile then comes to state that he's gay. 

 

Page 198, Column 1, paragraph 2: Check the spacing on "newshound."

 

Page 202-203: Paragraph repetition--the one that goes "Hanna is seem by some [...] along with digital theft," appears twice. 

 

Hanna's profile needs editing in general. As is, it's obvious that it's a merging of different documents that were not then edited.

 

Madame Nyx:

 

• Paragraph two is redundant. 
• Paragraph three works better as the first one.
• Paragraph five is missing text in its first line. 
• Paragraph one of column two: the second "Reality Bites" has spacing issues. 
• The final paragraph uses "her" when the rest of the profile has consistently used "he."

Page 217, Column 1, paragraph 4: the way the first parenthetical is written suggests that Zoë has fallen in love with Zoë. 

 

Page 252, Column 2, paragraph 3: spacing issue with "seventeen"

[Mime Paradox]

On a different note, I'm not sure how I feel about "April's Story" taking the place of her profile, given that it doesn't cover anything post The Longest Journey. I'm extremely glad to have it, but the lack of any info from later in her life also feels like an omission, given that it's one third of her story, and April is part of Dreamfall Chapters, even if posthumously. Did she really not rate a design document when the game was being developed?  Or would it have been pretty much exactly what we got in her profile, as seen in The Final Cut?

 

I'm also surprised that we didn't get a profile for the White Dragon reborn, given that she also technically shows up in Chapters. At least with her I can understand her not getting any new info written for the game, but still. 

[ShardofTruth]

So I've finished the tome of balance and while I think it's a great achievement to gather all this (design) information at one place and include so much unknown information (big thanks for the Queenie dialogues) which especially helps connecting Dreamfall to Dreamfall Chapters, I'm still sad some mysteries were not touched upon in the least. I'm not talking about the connection of April, Saga and the White Kin, since this one was specifically left out but some stuff like.

 

- The Necromancer King of Ge'en: Roper Klacks back story doesn't contain this time period at all.

 

- The Guardian of Balance and the Divide: there is no separate entry for this important position/place. I really liked to read more about the guardian's role in the context of the Dreamfall games.

 

- The Kins: Same as above, the information is pretty sparse which could be on purpose of course.

 

- April Ryan: She doesn't have an entry too. If we never get The Longest Journey Home it would have been nice to have at least a summary of that part of her life.

 

- The Prophet and the Undreaming: No entry for both of them. Why? The Storytime and connected entries are pretty extensive.

 

There was a heavy focus on Dreamfall Chapters, which is strange when some seemingly unimportant side characters get whole paragraphs of information while important people from the other two games are hardly mentioned at all (e.g. Emma, Charlie, Samantha Gilmore, Carlita etc.). Maybe the design documents where lost or are unavailable for these games, it still feels odd.

[tummy ooh aah]

Is anyone else a bit ticked that we're essentially being used as free copy editing labour here?

I for one will not be participating in this. Respect the profession and pay some real copy editors instead.

[ChrisR]

I haven't read the file yet, but I checked it and I can say that the art is so gorgeous that I'd like to have more pages dedicated just to it without text and in big resolution. Also I feel there was more art that was included into the book.

[Mime Paradox]

There was a heavy focus on Dreamfall Chapters, which is strange when some seemingly unimportant side characters get whole paragraphs of information while important people from the other two games are hardly mentioned at all (e.g. Emma, Charlie, Samantha Gilmore, Carlita etc.). Maybe the design documents where lost or are unavailable for these games, it still feels odd.

 

It seems fairly clear that this is a Dreamfall Chapters book, rather than a comprehensive tome about the series (which, speaking conservatively, would have been twice as large), and that Red Thread prioritized elements that were actually in the game over things that weren't. Viewed through this prism, the inclusions and exclusions are largely consistent, except for the ones I mentioned--April, who gets "April's Story" instead; the White Dragon Reborn--and arguably Benrime, who doesn't technically appear in Chapters.

[Teller]

Is anyone else a bit ticked that we're essentially being used as free copy editing labour here?

I for one will not be participating in this. Respect the profession and pay some real copy editors instead.

 

While I'm not ticked over it, I do agree with the sentiment.  However, this is the way most software companies seem to work anymore.  They release with only the basic QC, and patch/update/rerelease after bugs have been reported.   As a Document Control Manager and amateur editor this trend does bug me.  But it doesn't surprise me that they would follow this pattern especially with as late as this is and how low on funds they are. 

 

On the other hand, as a Document Control Manager and amateur editor, if I find mistakes I let the author know and want them to fix it.  So if I had time to read the Tome before the new year, I probably would have reported things myself.  As it is, I skimmed it for the pretty pictures and am happy to have it. 

 

Can't wait until it's physically in my hands.

[Ringtail]

Edited my earlier post to add some more things I found. 

 

I just finished reading it, and am feeling pretty melancholy.  This is it -  everything that's going to be said about April and the Draic Kin, and Crow, and the entire world that I discovered when I was 20 years old, alone in a new town, has been said.  That's a big feeling.

 

So, at the end of it all, I guess I just have one question...

 

...what the fuck was up with Cortez and Westhouse, anyway?  I need to know that shit!

[Lee-m]

It didn't seem to resolve Aprils origins It just picks up when she was 5. Nothing much we didn't already know.

Unfortunately like the games, most of the time the Tome ultimately ends up saying nothing, and hiding things that don't need to be hidden any longer. Shame, it didn't really answer any questions that I have been on my mind, and I guess that was the final opportunity.

[ChrisR]

Damn, I thought this book was a last chance to answer important questions and ties loose ends too...

[Indrid Cold]

One I just noticed that I've not seen mentioned before. I might edit this post if I find anything more.

Page 93 (46 in file), Ferdows's backstory: "not all Azadir […] are evil". Should probably be "Azadi".

Page 118 (59 in file), Onor Hileriss: "he dresses in a manner that went out of fashioed". Should be "fashion".

 

Page 274 (137 in file): Not exactly an error, but I'm surprised Ragnar hasn't objected to (or noticed) the use of the word "actress" instead of "actor" (paragraph 3).

 

Page 289 (144 in file): "He was the twelfth Guardian, and it was thirteen thousand years since the tradition had begun." The math seems wrong, unless the 12th was not the first Guardian to "overstay".

[MisterMetropolis]

It's so surreal to know this journey, the most beautiful story ever told in history, is now over after 19 years.

 

I would have loved a real-time ARG with Queenie! I presume they were going to have her, like, blogging or something in 2013/14. And I'm even younger than her so I'll definitely live long enough to see technology that will allow me to live forever  (although it will probably be only available for the obscenely wealthy)

 

Some of the backstory information was very cool. Interesting to know that Na'ane has a child somewhere, and Anna had one in the past. I was hoping the Tome would make Anna's presence make more sense, like if she originally had an actual point to being in the game that they left out, lol.

 

It was also really cool to read about the history of the world over the next 200 years (the EU falls in the ~late~ 21st century? lol).

 

I noticed it said Baruti was an only son, but in the game he had brothers. And it said Zoe got Wonkers when she was 8 - she got him when she was 4.

 

So Faith has a Chinese mother and an Indian father and is white as snow? How'd that work out?

 

I had completely forgotten about the scenario of Zoe working in the cupcake place. I remember that was actually a thing, but I remember it being kind of like a joke or something lol. That would have been awesome, though I can see why they had to cut it out. Three different scenarios would have made the game way too massive.

 

PAYPHONE? In 2209?

[Delosari]

This is the item I desired the most from the kickstarter. I am very happy it has finally arrived.

PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE... The final digital version make it single page for those who want to read it in a tablet.

Any pdf/cbr/cbz reader worth its bytes can join 2 pages but dividing pdf pages is not easy ( or at least I do not know a good way to do it)

Thank you

[Indrid Cold]

Finished reading the file. Overall, I've enjoyed it.

 

I've updated my earlier post with a few corrections and maybe-corrections, when they hadn't already been reported by others as far as I could see.

[ChrisR]

Comment from RTG on Kickstarter:

"@AstralWanderer: Thanks for the feedback!

Since you’re not the only one who’s commented on this, we wanted to clarify a few things about the Tome.

The Tome of the Balance is a comprehensive collection of design documents and fiction produced before, during and after the development of Dreamfall Chapters, in support of that game’s world and narrative. During the writing of the Tome, we also decided to incorporate some text from TLJ and Dreamfall design documents, to fill in more information about a few of the returning characters and locations. The Tome’s reason for existence was to give us a platform to share a bunch of things that never made it into the game(s), for various reasons, along with the materials produced as part of the world-building.

The Tome isn’t, and was never supposed to be, a continuation of the story or an opportunity to fill in blanks or answer lingering questions. Maybe there will be something like that in the future; the Tome ain’t it. So don’t expect this book to be a satisfactory conclusion to the saga, to April’s journey, to Zoë’s future — that was never its purpose, and if you begin reading with those expectations, you will be disappointed.

As for selling additional copies: we’ll have to see. You are absolutely right; we will have a few hundred copies left over after all the orders have been fulfilled. Some (most?) of those will be used as gifts to partners, friends and supporters. Some will remain in our library. As for the rest? We have thought about selling them, yes, but there are some licensing challenges to figure out first. So it’s not just a question of availability and cost. We’d love to eventually share the Tome with ALL of our backers, but reality might get in the way of that ambition. So we’ll just have to wait and see."

[Minstrum-Squall]

OK "Gift" that we paid with the game, a dematerialized goodies.

While my t-shirt, cd-ost and game (watila-usb) I got nothing.

 Any news on t-shirts version 2 and USB-key ??